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It's your pond, you bought the fish, you maintained the water environment, so keep the darn fish. You could invite your family and friends over to watch/help gather up the fish. Clean em, put em in a bag and have different people put their names on the bags. Put them in your freezer for safe keeping and you can give some away as you see fit. We all know you're an honest fellow, so I can't believe anyone would call you out.
Disclaimer: Take everything Polvo says with a grain of salt.
Swan-Diving off the tongues of crippled giants
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