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> MALE VS. FEMALE AT THE
> ATM MACHINE
> A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:
>
> 'Please note that this Bank is installing new
> Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw
> cash without leaving their vehicles.
>
> Customers using this new facility are requested to use the
> procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.
>
> After months of careful research, MALE &FEMALE
> Procedures have been developed. Please follow the
> Appropriate steps for your gender.'
>
> ************ ********* ********* *
> MALE PROCEDURE: >
> 1. Drive up to the
> cash machine.
> 2. Put down your car window.
> 3. Insert card into machine and
> enter PIN.
> 4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
> 5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.
> 6. Put window up.
> 7. Drive off.
>
>
> FEMALE PROCEDURE:
> What is
> really funny is that most of this part is the
> Truth!
>
> 1. Drive up to cash machine.
>
> 2. Reverse and back up the
> required amount to align car window with the
> machine.
> 3. Set parking brake,
> put the window down.
> 4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat
> to locate card.
> 5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and
> hang up..
> 6.. Attempt to insert card into
> machine....
> 7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to
> its excessive distance from the car.
> 8.. Insert card.
> 9. Re-insert card the right way.
> 10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written
> on the inside back page.
> 11. Enter PIN.
> 12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
> 13. Enter amount of cash required.
> 14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.
> 15. Retrieve cash and receipt...
> 16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash
> inside.
> 17. Write debit amount in cheque register and
> place receipt in back of cheque book.
> 18. Re-check makeup.
> 19. Drive forward 2 feet.
> 20. Reverse back to cash machine.
> 21. Retrieve card.
> 22.. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card
> into the slot provided!
> 23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind
> you.
> 24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.
> 25. Redial person on cell phone..
> 26.
> Drive for 2 to 3 miles.
> 27. Release Parking Brake..