Dadgummit, here I am all pretty and full in my fishing powers and ain't got a sponsor one. Almost nary a day doesn't go by that I don't tell somebody what they ought to be buying and ain't a one of them free loadin' companies I endorse has bothered to send me not one dang thing free.

Anybody got an in with Toyota, Basscat, War Eagle, Yamaha, Tony Edgar, Power Pro, Southern Pro, Lowrance/Garmin/H'bird/Apple, or Charmin Ultra Soft? If so, put in a good word for me and have their people contact my people. Be sure to tell 'em to send samples and a contract.

Wannabe...