Thread: Sam barred from Walmart

Yesterday San was at the Thomasville Walmart

store buying a large bag of Purina dog food for his loyal pet and was

in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked him if he had a dog..

What did she think he had, an elephant? So, since he was bored, feeling good from his surgery, and having

little to do, on impulse he told her that no, he didn't have a dog, he was

starting the Purina Diet again.

He added that he probably shouldn’t,

because last time he ended up in hospital, but he'd lost 12 pounds before he

woke up in intensive care with tubes coming out of most of his orifices

and IVs in both arms.

He told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and the way that

it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat

one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally

complete so it works well and he was going to try it again. (I have to

mention here that practically everyone in line was now captivated with

his story.)

Horrified, she asked me if he ended up in intensive care because the dog

food poisoned me. He told her no, He stepped off the curb to sniff an

Irish Setter's butt, and a car hit him.

He thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was

laughing so hard. Sam is now banned from Walmart.

Just kidding, this was posted on SC and adjusted it to fit Sam. Sounds like him, don't you think.

Damn yankee, but your still my damn yankee.