• Fish now or forever hold your peace - by TJ Stallings


    Benjamin, Ethan and Lily


    It was a moment of time that I will never forget. The objective was clear then, rather forlorn now.

    Grandsons Benjamin and Ethan were standing in their living room. In a moment of what I thought would be inspiration I said, “Boys, I’m getting a new boat next month. Please get good grades on your next report card so I can take you fishing”. Their eyes lit up as if they were looking at a Christmas tree. Their sister Lily smiled and said it was fun to fish with Paw-Paw. She knew from experience. Good grades came easily for her.

    It was a misty morning while all three of them waited for their school bus. Ethan darted in front of a vehicle while playing with his brother. The driver braked and swerved but it was too late. Ethan died instantly.
    My moment of “leadership” failed. Ethan will never go on that fishing trip. I dangled that trip on the boat like a carrot, hoping to inspire him. In hindsight, I realize I did that all backwards.

    Leadership by example is far more effective. Had I taken Ethan fishing upfront, he would have been far more motivated to get good grades. Perhaps Ethan would have chosen to read a book like his sister that fateful morning. We will never know.
    Ethan did not die for nothing, as three good things will happen.

    First, the dangerous bus stop lies between two curves in the road with an intersection in the middle. We are petitioning the county to erect bus stop signs on both sides of the road. Seven other children will be safer for it.

    Secondly, Ethan’s brother will be going fishing as soon as the weather warms up.

    Thirdly, this grandfather learned a tough lesson about leadership.

    Blessings, -TJ
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    Comments 12 Comments
    1. crappie4me2's Avatar
      crappie4me2 -
      TJ, I'm very sorry about your loss. I'll keep yall in our prayers.
    1. Big H trucking's Avatar
      Big H trucking -
      Very moving, Sorry for your loss

      Sent from my SGH-T989 using Tapatalk
    1. CrappieBeast69's Avatar
      CrappieBeast69 -
      My condolences...
    1. dallas1's Avatar
      dallas1 -
      I read this last night and it broke my hart for you Prayers for you and the family!
    1. Cray's Avatar
      Cray -
      Condolences from our family and you and your family will be lifted up in prayer.
    1. Slab's Avatar
      Slab -
      So sorry for your loss TJ. We will send prayers for the whole family.
    1. anchorpuller's Avatar
      anchorpuller -
      My sympathy to you and your family TJ. Having been here awhile and getting to know some of our folks on Crappie.com; I can tell you that Ethan is up there getting minnows with Frank (a dear crappie.com legend) and waiting on ya
    1. TJ Stallings's Avatar
      TJ Stallings -
      Thank you all for your kind words. I hope all that read this will take a kid fishing. We'll worry about the report cards later.
      Blessings, TJ

      Quote Originally Posted by anchorpuller View Post
      My sympathy to you and your family TJ. Having been here awhile and getting to know some of our folks on Crappie.com; I can tell you that Ethan is up there getting minnows with Frank (a dear crappie.com legend) and waiting on ya
    1. BigRiverMarine's Avatar
      BigRiverMarine -
      May GOD Bless and Comfort you and yours. Prayers Sent!!!


      BRM
    1. GrumpyLoomis's Avatar
      GrumpyLoomis -
      The next trip for my grand kids is in honor of Ethan and the great family support he had. God bless you and yours, GrumpyLoomis.....
    1. Special K's Avatar
      Special K -
      What a tragic thing it is when such a young and innocent life is lost... and the pain and anguish that I know it has caused you and the rest of the family. You were only doing what you thought was right under the conditions urging he, his brother and sister to get good grades on their next report card... before you got your boat... because we all know you would have been happy to take them fishing anyway.

      It's clear to me that I don't have the words that are near appropriate for tragic situations like these... so I pray, Lord bless you and your family and may the warmth of His face and presence shine upon you all in your time of mourning, pain and sorrow. In Jesus Name... Amen.
    1. "G"'s Avatar
      "G" -
      Prayers sent for the whole family
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