Living will

[gone fission]

LIVING WILL FORM

I, ____________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no
circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade
biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers/doctors/hospitals interested in simply running up the bills.

If a reasonable amount of time passes, and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

______a Martini
______a Margarita
______a Scotch and soda
______a Bloody Mary
______a Gin and Tonic
______a Glass of Chardonnay
______a Steak
______Lobster or crab legs
______ The remote control
______ a bowl of ice cream (or a Cappuccino /Heathbar Blizzard from DQ)
______The sports page
______Sex
______or Chocolate.

It should be presumed that I won't ever get any better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my
appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, and call it a day. At this point, it is
time to call the New Orleans Jazz Funeral Band to come do their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to
raise their glasses to toast the good times we have had.

Signature: ___________________________ Date: _____________________

NOTE: I also hear that in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The patients are happier, and they have a lot
more visitors. Some of them don't even need embalming when their time comes. If anyone knows the name of this
happy place, PLEASE pass it on to me!

[SeaRay]

I changed the Martini to a Manhattan and I am good to go, so to speak. (Probably should have just added it since I like a good martini also)