Sniffer......

[labill]

A Man Gets Into His Seat On An Airline, Which Is About To Take Off, When Another Man With A Labrador Retriever Occupies The Two Empty Seats.

Beside Him. The Lab Is Situated In The Middle And The First Man Is Looking Quizzically At The Dog When The Second Man Explains That They Work For The Airline.

The Airline Rep Says, "don't Mind Sniffer. He's A Sniffing Dog, The Best There Is. I'll Show You Once We Get Airborne When I Put Him To Work".

The Plane Takes Off And Levels Out When The Handler Says To The First Man, "watch This". He Tells The Dog, "sniffer, Search". Sniffer Jumps Down, Walks Along The Aisle And Sits Next To A Woman For A Few Seconds. It Then Returns To Its Seat And Puts One Paw On The Handler's Arm. He Says, "good Boy".

The Airline Rep Turns To The First Man And Says, "that Woman I S In Possession Of Marijuana, So I'm Making A Note Of This And Her Seat Number For The Police Who Will Apprehend Her Upon Arrival".

"fantastic"! Replies The First Man. Once Again, He Sends Sniffer To Search The Aisles. The Lab Sniffs About, Sits Down Beside A Man For A Few Seconds, Returns To Its Seat, And Places Two Paws On The Handler's Arm. The Airline Rep Says, "that
Man Is Carrying Cocaine, So Again, I'm Making A Note Of This And The Seat Number.

"i Like It", Says The First Man.

A Third Time, The Rep Sends Sniffer To Search The Aisles. Sniffer Goes Up And Down The Plane And After A While, Sits Down Next To Someone.

He Then Comes Racing Back, Jumps Up Onto His Seat, And Poops All Over The Place.

The First Man Is Really Grossed Out By This Behavior From A Supposedly Well-trained Sniffing Dog And Asks, "what's Going On?"

The Handler Replies Nervously, "he Just Found A Bomb."

[labill]

Life Explained

On the first day God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the
door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks past. I will
give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten years and
I'll give you back the other ten." So God agreed.

On the second day God created the monkey. God said, "Entertain people,
do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty-year life span."

The monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I don't
think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too, okay?" And
God agreed.

On the third day God created the cow. God said, "You must go to the
field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves
and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty
years."


The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for
sixty years. Let me have twenty and I'll give back the other forty." And
God agreed again.
On the forth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep, play, marry
and enjoy your life. I'll give you twenty years."

Man said, "What? Only twenty years! Tell you what, I'll take my twenty,
and the forty the cow gave back and the ten the monkey gave back and the
ten the dog gave back, that makes eighty, okay?" "Okay," said God, "You've
got a deal."


So that is why the first twenty years we eat, sleep, play, and enjoy
ourselves; for the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our
family; for the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the
grandchildren; and for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and
bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

[shadow]

Bill that was a good one.

[CrappieLips]

Those were pretty good bill

[reelcrappie]

Labill, I suspect you speak from experience. LOL! You are right on.