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Thread: Special Gvmt programfor Seniors

  1. #1
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    Default Special Gvmt programfor Seniors


    New Government Senior Program






    ________________________________






    Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in
    the economy, Congress has

    decided to implement a scheme to put workers of
    50 years of age and above on early retirement, thus creating jobs and
    reducing unemployment.


    This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged
    People Early).

    Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to
    Congress to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After
    Forced Termination).

    Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be
    reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early
    Workers).


    A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and
    SCREWED as many times as Congress deems appropriate.

    Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS
    (Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for
    Retired Personnel Early Severance).


    Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will
    not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Congress.

    Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on
    will receive as much *HIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible.
    Congress has always prided themselves on the amount of *HIT they give

    our citizens..


    Should you feel that you do not receive enough
    *HIT, please bring this to the attention of your Congressman, who has
    been trained to give you all the *HIT you can handle.

    Sincerely,
    The Committee for Economic Value of Individual
    Lives (E.V.I.L.)


    PS - - Due to recent budget cuts and the rising
    cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions,
    the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
    Reaper, Where Fish come to Fry

  2. #2
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    Good one. :D

  3. #3
    Billbob's Avatar
    Billbob is offline Crappie.com Legend - 2013 Guber Of The Year * Crappie.com Supporter
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    dont put me in that
    PROUD MEMBER OF TEAM GEEZER

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  4. #4
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    OHHHHHHHH Dearrrrrrrrrrrrr Reapers been nippin the jug a nibbles again

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