Good one. :D
New Government Senior Program
________________________________
Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown in
the economy, Congress has
decided to implement a scheme to put workers of
50 years of age and above on early retirement, thus creating jobs and
reducing unemployment.
This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged
People Early).
Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to
Congress to be considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After
Forced Termination).
Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be
reviewed under the SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early
Workers).
A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and
SCREWED as many times as Congress deems appropriate.
Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS
(Additional Income for Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for
Retired Personnel Early Severance).
Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will
not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Congress.
Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on
will receive as much *HIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible.
Congress has always prided themselves on the amount of *HIT they give
our citizens..
Should you feel that you do not receive enough
*HIT, please bring this to the attention of your Congressman, who has
been trained to give you all the *HIT you can handle.
Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual
Lives (E.V.I.L.)
PS - - Due to recent budget cuts and the rising
cost of electricity, gas and oil, as well as current market conditions,
the Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.
Reaper, Where Fish come to Fry
Good one. :D
dont put me in that
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OHHHHHHHH Dearrrrrrrrrrrrr Reapers been nippin the jug a nibbles again